Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Oh the Tantrums!


Oh these 4 year old's tantrums are driving me nuts!  He has been having them multiple times a day over everything from the baby taking his toy to not wanting to eat dinner.  I have decided that for my sanity I am done and I am going to get strict.

For awhile I was really good at ignoring him when he threw them and just walking away, but I started responding to them way too much when I had the baby.  I think I respond more because I have 2 babies  who are talking, or crying, or screaming all at the same time and I just want it to stop.  Or maybe it is because he is so loud when he throws his fits that if the baby is sleeping he wakes him up.





Whatever the reason, I have to stop and I have made this promise to myself and my husband because we are about to lose our minds!  Today is the 2nd day of me trying.  The first day didn't work so well because I ended up just putting him in time out or getting upset rather than ignoring.  Today is going much better.

So far today he has thrown about 20 tantrums (only a slight exaggeration!).  I told him last night at bedtime that from now on when he throws a tantrum, whatever he is throwing it about, he will not get or the toy will be taken away for the day.

One example from today is a blanket that we all use in the living room.  He likes it a lot because it is fluffy.  The baby lay down on it today and he immediately started a tantrum.  I took the blanket and put it in the ottoman and told him that he lost it for the day.  He proceeded to scream and throw himself all over the place and I just ignored him and played with the babies.  His fit got louder and more dramatic until he realized I still wasn't paying attention and he finally stopped and started playing with us.  I pretended like he didn't even throw the fit.

I have already seen a difference in his tantrums and how frequently and less loud they are and it has only been a half of a day.  This is something I will have to constantly work on because as soon as he gets a reaction, he knows he will get it again.

For all of you who have fit throwers living with them, IGNORE them and STAY CALM and they will stop!  I know it is easier said than done, but if I can do it, anybody can!

Hope you have a tantrum free day!

6 comments:

  1. I did the same thing the other day. Out of no where, my son said "Stupid mama!" He NEVER talks like this and I was shocked to hear it. I don't know where he even got it from. Anyways, I told him to say he was sorry and he said, "No." He was in the middle of watching Spongebob, so I calmly turned it off and told him I would turn it back on when he said he was sorry. He then proceeded to throw a huge tantrum, which I ignored. Eventually, (20 to 30 minutes later) he calmed down, I got my apology and explained to him that language like that is not nice and then we resumed Spongebob.

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    1. It is amazing the things that come out of their mouths! My son says things to me like that too and I wonder where he heard it, but he might have just made it up! Sometimes it is really hard to be calm when they say things like that, but we have to remember that they react how they see us react. Man do I wish I could just throw myself on the ground screaming like them sometimes! I wonder what they would do?!

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    2. Yup, I have felt the same. If only we could also have a tantrum, and get it all out :)
      And about what they would do? You could do role play for fun when everyone is in a calm mood! I was amazed at how mature my preschoolers were acting when I was having the "pretend" tantrum, but probably because they knew it was pretend...

      And of course, ignoring is really hard for some reason, although it works wonders!

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    3. I am going to try throwing a tantrum and see what happens!

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  2. And this too shall pass! Good job!

    Following from the Friday Follow Along. :-)

    ~Michiko
    www.theressomethingaboutmichiko.com

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  3. My youngest is 5 now and with both of my boys I found that age 4 was the WORST age for tantrums! Walking away USUALLY works for me, but every now and then he will still throw one and follow me around until I acknowledge him lol!

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